On the 8th Date of Christmas...

On the 8th Date of Christmas
W/M/33??? Don't remember his occupation

12/31/11


Well I just had to. I didn't really plan on this date either. Although I had decided that the last 6 dates were going to be on my watch, I hadn't exactly pulled my online dating profile down yet. And then I got the message in my inbox. It was like gold. A dude was from San Francisco and he was going to be in Portland for a few days. A few things were great about this. 1.) He was from out of town, so I wouldn't have to see him again if I didn't want to. 2.) He wasn't going to get attached too quickly because of logistics. And 3.) He was in town for a wedding. But not just any wedding. A wedding on New Year's Eve! And I was invited. Yes.


I knew there was a reason I had decided not to make any specific New Year's Plans with anybody. At a wedding you can't go wrong. People are always drinking and always dancing. This was going to be awesome! Count. Me. In.


Well the night before I had randomly decided to go out with my bestie from HS. We met up with some friends and ended up having a few drinks. It was super fun! We drank. We sang. We danced. We even ended up at a Salsa club and myself and her and my other buddy were probably the only white people in there, but we got our groove on. I stayed on her couch that night and woke up with a bit of a head ache so I had no intention of drinking that night. I wanted to start the New Year off right, and preferably be sober going into it.


Mr. August called me and asked if I would prefer to meet him for lunch before I met him at the wedding reception. No way Jose! I would prefer the surprise element. He was down too. The wedding was at the Fairgate Inn in Camas Washington. I opted to miss the wedding and hit the reception. But what was I going to wear? I had a dress that I could wear that was fancy enough, but it was strapless, and I really didn't want to have any limitations while dancing so I opted for the mall.


I tried on dress after dress, and nothing was speaking to me. Just as I was leaving the mall though and had decided to go for the dress I was originally thinking of, I saw it. It was bright Orange and vibrant colors. It had poofy sleeves from the 80's. It was wild. As soon as I saw it, I knew it would look good on. And it did. I felt hot. It didn't really feel like a fancy wedding reception dress, but it was New Years Eve too and I thought it fit with that theme better, so I went for it in case I had to ditch the wedding for any reason. I accessorized with some awesome feather earrings, a thick black belt to go around the waste and my famous black boots! Plus, I kind of felt like I needed to dress a little bit wild, since I was about to do something wild.


I got home and I tried to nap and just couldn't, so instead I painted my fingernails (something I hadn't done in years!). Me and my roomies pumped up the jams to pump up ourselves for the night and all got ready. We tried on outfits for each other and gave opinions. We walked around the house half naked doing our hair and makeup, giving ourselves hours in advance to relax and get ready. I shaved my legs, my pits, and my bikini line. I put on a thong and some tights, and was feeling fresh! Let's do this!


And speaking of thongs, they are absolutely the most uncomfortable thing anyone has ever come up with. If you disagree with me, you lie. I mean if you're going for no panty lines while in a dress, it's better to be in that than to show your beaver to everyone while stepping out of a vehicle. Sorry Britney. Nothing but love for you... And since I was going to be at a wedding, who knows what kind of dancing I was going to get myself into. Ass floss it is. And hey... if the date bombs, then you never know who is going to be at the wedding that's single if you know what I'm sayin' eh eh eh???... ;) Not really... but fun to think about anyway.


It's finally time. I show up around 9:40 pm. Late enough to where hopefully not many people will notice me coming in. The band has already started, and people should be feeling drunk enough not to care. I get in the parking lot and this Bed and Breakfast is just beautiful. It's super fancy. I instantly start second guessing my outfit. There's no way I'm dressed fancy enough for this joint. I call Mr. August to see if he will come meet me and it goes to voicemail. I'm giving it 10 minutes and if he doesn't call back, I'm just going to go to a friend's party in Gresham. He called back within the minute. Here goes nothing.


It's freezing outside but I am sweating already. At least my dress has enough colors that you can't notice too much when I'm pitting out. Why am I nervous all of a sudden? This is a rare feeling for me, especially in this kind of situation. My hands are balmy and I feel like I'm about to do a public speech that I haven't prepared for. Holy crap.


He starts walking towards me, but it's dark. I can barely make him out. I really only looked at his profile picture once. I didn't really care all too much who I was meeting, I just liked the fact that he was 6'4". That will make up for anything else that may be wrong with his physical appearance, at least to get me through the night. We instantly hug when we meet. Already better than a lot of the first encounters I've come across on this whole dating adventure. I can't really make out his face, but let's get inside and start dancing.


Turns out the band was a Beatle's Cover Band. I was super stoked. But I wouldn't get to enjoy it yet because it was now time for the bride to toss the boquet to all of the single ladies. What the heck. I could see people staring at me as I set my purse and coat in the corner and lined up with the only other 3 single girls there. Who is this girl? was written all over their faces. And it's not like my outfit blended in with the evening attire. I didn't really feel like catching it though, since there was a girl on crutches that came out. She can have it. And she did. Phew. Glad that was over. Now it's his turn to catch the Garter.


Man. I thought I was going to have missed all of that stuff, but oh well. It was entertaining at least. And then Mr. August asked if we could go to his room and chat. He was staying at the bed and breakfast there that night. I set my purse and coat down in his room and we started chatting. "So... what do you do?" conversation started. Dang it, I thought I was going to avoid this whole awkward job interview feeling since I would be at a wedding, but it turns out he still wanted to have it. I felt more nervous than an important job interview. I really wanted a drink, but I still refrained. I needed to stay in control tonight. Plus, I don't need a drink to have fun, but just one might have helped a little.


Now that that's over with, let's dance already! We danced and it was cool. I tried to make friends on the dance floor and introduced myself to the only single ladies dancing by themselves and joined in. One of them happened to be an 11 year old girl. I think I'll be friends with her tonight! Mr. August was getting himself a drink as I was mingling and dancing and making friends. When he finally made his way out to the dance floor, one of the ladies that I had just met introduced me to him. Ha. "I'm his date." I announced.


Well Mr. August decided he was going to be embarassed letting his friends know that he met me online, so he made up a story that I was his roommate from college's cousin and I had visited him at school a couple of times, and that he had to see me when I was here. I let him do the talking as I watched his friends looks of confusion as he fumbled on the story. Good times.


I made friends with the band instantly, and was chatting them up all night. Looking over their set list. Making sure they had music playing, when they were on break. They needed a little help it seemed. But they were super sweet and seemed to enjoy my company. I continued to drink water for the night.


I was finally starting to loosen up and I busted a move like nobody's business. I watched as the clock got closer to midnight, the guests got friendlier and drunker. It was hilarious. One older couple was dancing and twirling and then the husband let go of his wife and she kept spinning and came tumbling into the crowd of dancers, destined to fall on her butt and break a hip. I was feeling rather Zoro-esque though, and felt like it happened in slow motion. I saw the damsel in distress, and my cat-like reflexes instantly grabbed her before she tumbled, and we were all of a sudden as close as two lovers would be, and she was in my arms. Well hello mam. I felt like I should go in for the kiss, but that may have been over kill. "Nice catch." she tells me. And I free her back to her husband. It's now an instant party.


The band is playing almost all oldies and I am loving it! I know all the words to almost every single song. I finally decide to take my boots off and I moon walk across the floor back to my date. The guests are going wild. They are eating me up. Drunk husbands are starting to feel like it's a good idea to come and talk to me, I'm not sure that the drunk wives were feeling quite as friendly though. The older women and men love me though. I'm not sure what it is about the older crowd, but I just fit right in with them, and they were my dancing partners for the night.


The date himself was alright. He was nice, but almost a little too friendly. I was his date, and he wanted to claim his territory. His hands were all over my ass all night. I didn't really care all too much, cause my dress did show off my booty rather nicely, so I couldn't blame the guy. The more he drank, the lower his hand would get. We boogied down, and slow danced too. It was fun, but I wasn't all too interested in him. Good for the night though.


Finally, midnight was approaching and I knew what was coming. I was completely sober at this point, but I'm usually always down for a little new years kiss. Almost everyone at the wedding had a date, so I probably did this guy a favor by being his for the night. He wouldn't have had anyone to kiss at midnight otherwise. We all counted down with the band and at the strike of midnight, we toasted with a sip of champagne and a New Years Kiss. It was not inappropriate at all. It was like an old movie kiss with no tongue. It swayed from side to side, but we kept it classy. After the kiss was over we started walking the other direction, and then he went in for a second kiss. Alright buud, don't push your luck.


"It's too bad the band didn't have someone to kiss at midnight..." Says Mr. August.


Within the minute, each band member had received a happy news years kiss on the cheek from yours truly. They loved it. I could sense the other lady's eyes burning on me though. Oops.


It's time to wrap up the night and the band is looking for their final song. I ask them to play that funky music, and they dedicated the white boy song to me, or rather "The beautiful young lady, passing out kisses."


We get down and they have us form 2 lines to have a dance off down the aisle. Couples are taking turns, and when Mr. August got to the front of the line, he called for me to join him, but I had something else in mind. I was gonna win this competition, and I didn't need him to mess it up for me. I had danced with him all night anyway, so I pawned off the 11 year old on him that got too nervous to go so he went by himself. Everyone had gone, and it was my turn to show em up. Bring it bitches. ha. I could see Mr. August trying to make his way back to the front of the line not to leave me hanging, but that's exactly what I wanted, so I hurried out there. And then I dropped to the floor. And here I go in my dress and all. The worm. Or the Caterpillar. Whatever you want to call it. It was go big or go home at this point. I'm now really glad that I opted for the Ass floss rather than the bare bottom that night. The guests roared with cheers and were in complete dis-belief that I had just done that. They had no idea that the Brown Bomb (Me) had just been dropped on them. Luckily (or unluckily) both of my sister's weren't there too, to add to the excitement.


Mother in laws, Father in laws, Grandmas, Uncles, Cousins, you name it were coming up to me to chat me up. They all smiled at me, and I could see everyone in the room chatting about me. It was hilarious. I think at this point I was officially a wedding crasher, if it wasn't official before. Mr. August really wanted me to stay. We all sat down chatting as he rubbed each of my feet. A girl could get used to this. "Well you deserve it." Yes... now that's what I'm talking about. I LOVE foot rubs! In fact, I love any type of massage. The harder the better really. I want to see those man hands work. But, no. I'm still not staying the night with you. I didn't stay sober for nothing.


Mr. August walked me back up to his room so I could get my stuff. This time he is practically begging for me to stay the night with him. He doesn't care. He'll sleep on the floor. He'll sleep in the hall. He's pleading at all costs. Sorry, but the answer is still no. I'm driving home and having breakfast with my family in the morning. He leans in to kiss me again. I take a step back. "I really should be going." He poors himself a shot of some type of pinkish alcohol and tells me I was supposed to be drinking that with him. I'm not sure how drunk this guy is, but he's pretty waisted.


"Come to San Francisco for my birthday." He shouts. "I will fly you there and take care of you. It will be fun." I play along with him to please him, but I'm really just interested in leaving the drunk mess at this point. "Can you at least stay a little longer so I can play with your ass?" Really?


"No, you can't. I'm going. Good night."


I left. Feeling pretty proud of myself for staying sober and having a good time. But not only that, but as I was leaving everyone was saying goodbye on a first name basis and telling Mr. August how much they loved me. I got home and got a text from him, telling me how he was talking to the bride and groom's parents and they were telling him how much of a hit I was, and then he was trying to convince me to move to San Fran. Mission accomplished. Ha.


Happy New Year!

On the 7th Date of Christmas...

On the 7th Date of Christmas

Mr. July

W/M/32 Financial something or other

This was actually an accidental date. I met Mr. July when I had first moved to the hood in SE Portland a few months ago. It was my first night on the town and I was exploring my neighborhood. I decided to go into the Brooklyn Park Pub (on foot) and had my first drink there. I sat at my own table, and there was this guy sitting at the bar that was being super chatty with the bartender, and kept looking back at me. Once he realized I was sitting by myself, he started chatting with me. He was very friendly, but a little over the top for me. Kind of a beefy dude. I was actually hoping to see another guy that night. I'll just call this guy Mr. Wrong.

Mr. Wrong is wrong in so many ways. He's much older, in a loveless marriage, and has a couple of kids. I have known him for years. I won't go into too much more details to save the privacy of his identity, but I love that guy to death. Mr. Wrong and I have always just been friends, but somewhere over the last 6 months or so that changed unexpectedly. I'm not one to develop feelings for a guy very easily, and I think the fact that this guy was somewhat unattainable and "safe" drew me closer to him. It's easy to love, when you know you have nothing to lose. You can be yourself, when it doesn't matter. Enough on Mr. Wrong, because he doesn't deserve much more than a paragraph.

When I was at the Brooklyn Park Pub, Mr. July decided to come sit with me at my table. He actually was making decent conversation with me, but all I could think about was how excited I was to see Mr. Wrong that evening. Mr. July had put in a lot of effort though, and I recognized that, so I gave him my number. He was new to town and was looking for some more friends. He actually left the Pub to meet up with some other friends so I was off the hook! Alllrriiight. :)

Feeling good from my first drink, I decide to keep walking and see what else my new little neighborhood had to offer. I found the Bear Paw. The Bear Paw is a total dive bar, but it had Karaoke. I do love to sing, but generally not a huge fan of Karaoke. I'm a performer, and the fact that Karaoke is unrehearsed makes me a little uneasy about it. But I don't know a single soul, and I decide to order another drink and sign up for any and every song I can. Not only do I sing my songs, but I helped every performer sing their songs when they couldn't get the words right! It was a blast! This was going to be a fun night.

Then as I was singing Carrie Underwood's "Last Name" and serinating the crowd I made eye contact with a guy at the bar. It was Mr. July again. Crap. Now, do I have to hang out with this guy tonight? What if Mr. Wrong show's up? This could get awkward fast. But whatever. I don't owe either of these guys anything. I'm having a good time, regardless. Maybe they will both want to hang out with me? I 'll be such a pimp. But time to break the seal first. Gotta pee!

As I come out of the bathroom, I totally forgot that I saw Mr. July at the bar, and I heard the end of The Little Mermaid's "Part of Your World" Playing and people were cheering. Damn it! That's my favorite song in the world! Or at least it felt like it at the moment. How could I have missed that? I charge the guy coming back from the Karaoke machine.

"Dude! Did you just sing the Little Mermaid Song?!" I scream in excitement.

"Yup." He replies

"Ooh man. That's my favorite song ever! Can't believe I missed it! Wanna sing it again?"

This complete stranger and I lock eyes for what seems to be an hour, but rather it's the length of the whole song. We are in perfect unison as we sing to each other, in perfect harmony the Little Mermaid Theme song. Our hands are locked as he sways me back and forth and nobody else is in the room. We are having the most amazing time of our life. The finale of the song is about to happen, and he sweeps me off my feet and carries me like a new bride and we spin as we finish the song. And then I see him. Mr. Wrong has locked eyes with me and suddenly I'm back in reality that I'm in this stranger's arms. I slide down, thank him for the song, and am instantly drawn towards Mr. Wrong.

"You can't be left alone anywhere D." Mr. Wrong confesses with a grin.

He seriously knows me so well and just makes me smile every time I see him. I didn't know what to expect when I saw him that night, but as soon as he was there, I wanted nothing but to let him know that I was his and only his, if not just for this moment in time while he had me. We hung out at the bar and chatted for a little bit longer and held each other, not caring who else was around and then he stayed the night with me. No we didn't bone. And I don't plan on it. He needs to figure out his life before he gets that part of mine, but I was happy to have him stay with me. He snuck out around 6am, and then reality set in. I'm just the other girl. How did I get here? I'm better than this, and deserve better than this. I know it. But, I still want this. I still want to be his. damn it.

I got a phone call from Mr. July the next day. I just so happened to be parked at my Sister's house about to leave and I saw that I missed a call. They didn't leave a message, so my curiosity got the best of me. Dang it. It was Mr. July. We actually chatted on the phone for a good half hour. I confessed to him during this conversation that had I had his number, I probably wouldn't have called back, but I was surprised and actually enjoyed chatting with him. I don't think anything is wrong with honesty. We made plans for the next night.

Mr. Wrong had left town, and before he left town he was supposed to help me with something, and he let me down again. Screw it, I'm having fun with Mr. July tonight, whether it's wrong or right! I don't owe Mr. Wrong anything! We ended up having a pretty fun night. But I wanted to drink away my pain, so we walked to a bunch of different bars and had drinks at each one. He was a know it all, and was kind of hard to listen to at first. But we both loosened up after a few drinks. It was just an okay time for me, but I was feeling good and we kissed goodnight at the door. I was actually pretty surprised that he came in for the kiss... but had to admire his balls.

He texted and called after that, and I really didn't feel like seeing him again. Not that he was a bad person, but I just wasn't interested in dating him. I really just needed him for that night. And that's the extent I wanted it to go. He got the hint I think and I hadn't heard from him in a while, and then the other night (months later... And this in real time is late December)I was having a pretty down night. Mr. Wrong was texting me and I'd just had it emotionally. Quit toying with my heart. I'm not even sure if Mr. Wrong was available if I'd want to be with him or not, but the fact that I don't have that option makes me feel like a pretty horrible person for believing there's a chance, when I know deep down there isn't. I had been on the 6 dates of Christmas already and just ready to quit. The feeling of defeat was running through my veins. And then the tears came. The chocolate dissappeared. And my heart broke. Just for a split second. I was allowing myself to feel pain. And be okay with it. Just give me the night.

And then amidst all of the pain I was feeling, I got a text from Mr. July. He was telling me how much I sucked for not getting back to him, and that I needed to just tell him that I wasn't interested if that was the case. He then continued to tell me how he'd been dating tons of other women and to not think that I was hot stuff because he had plenty of other women to choose from. WTF. First off, I don't even know this guy and don't owe him anything. Second, if he hasn't gotten the hint that I'm not interested by now, that's his own problem. And third, I hate that I have hurt someone's feeling's regardless whether it was justified or not, and I want to make things right, but tonight is not the night to mess with me. I let him have it. I told him he was being a dick, and that I didn't need to hear it from him. And that I could care less how many other women he was dating, and by him telling me all of that made him sound like a tool and that no, I am not interested.

He was actually very pleased to get this response from me. He said he was glad to have gotten some kind of reaction from me to show that I cared at all. Then he called me. Texting sucks, because you can't really hear tone anyway. So we chatted for the next hour, and I cried on the phone to him. To an almost complete stranger. And I told him why I hadn't gotten back to him. I told him about Mr. Wrong. And I told him I was sad. I was sorry if I hurt his feelings, because I didn't mean to, but in fact my feelings were hurt too.

He was a very good sport and had me let it all out, and tried to say the right words, which most men can't. But it was sweet none the less. I felt like I wanted to show my gratitude towards him. We are neighbors and he wants to make friends and network. We agreed that we are just going to be friends, but that we should still make an effort to hang out. This was made very clear. So the other night I was at work. I was starving and had been outside in the rain all night. I remember he said he loved to cook for other people, so I made an effort and reached out. I asked him straight up if he wanted to cook me dinner. I'll bring the wine. He was down.

We had leftover home made spaghetti and meatballs. I brought Wine. I kept him company in the kitchen while he cooked. He burnt the bottom of the pan, and teased that a pretty girl in his kitchen made him nervous. I was in sweats, and had refused to shower before coming over. It was hot and I was totally pitting out, and probably sweating from my forehead. My hair was frizzy from the rain, and probably mascara running from my eyes. I didn't really care. Not trying to impress anybody.

We listened to music. Had good chats. Drank some wine. Flirted a little bit, but I flirt with everybody, so I didn't think it was weird. My plate of food was much bigger than his, and then I realized I had practically licked my plate, and he couldn't finish his. Dang. We both laughed about this. It was getting close to midnight, and I was proud that I had made a new friend. And then it was time to go.

"Thank you so much Mr. July for having me over for dinner tonight. I really appreciated it. It's getting pretty late though, so I'm going to take off."

The look on his face was that of a child who had just been told no to the last piece of candy. I was a little confused with the look but I guess we were having a good time, and I can see why he still wanted me to hang out, but it will be alright dude. And then he went for the kill. Totally grabbed my face and started kissing me. Crap! Does this guy not remember the conversation we had a couple nights ago? I don't think this is an act of friends buuud! Do I really have to have this conversation again? And he's still kissing me...

The kissing continues because he's being so aggressive and I don't want to hurt his feelings. I'm trying to give the shortest kisses possible and smoothly transition out of this, but he has another thing planned. He starts pulling me towards the couch. I can feel him trying to get me to lay down so he can have his way with me, and I fight his strength to stay upright, but he's a former body builder, so it's not the easiest task. What have I gotten myself into? Finally I break free of this nonsense and try to crack a joke.

"Well I've got to admire your tenacity." I say, in a moment of awkwardness. At this point, I'm not even sure if tenacity was the right word to use, or what it even means, so I start fake laughing to hide the fact I have no idea what I just said.

He give me the look of seduction. But not the look you want to see. More the look of the guy in the creeper van that asks if you want any candy. Eek. And he says in a sultry voice, " I should have started this 2 hours ago. You're an amazing Kisser." Eek. Get me outa here! But I was tempted to stay and show him how good I could really kiss, since he thought my pulling away was good. Not worth it D. Get out of there.

At this point in time I realize this guy is stopping for nothing, so I grab what I could and I get out the door as quick as possible. Did that really just happen? He begins to tell me how it's crazy how strong our connection is and that we definitely need to see each other before 3 months passes. I realize then that I left my cheese and meat there that I also brought, but I cut my losses and ditch. It's not worth it to go back in there. I also realize then, this guy is crazy to think that our connection is that strong. It's definitely going to be a heck of a lot more than 3 months before I see him again, if I ever do! I guess this means the Brooklyn Park Pub will no longer be getting my business.

And so much for choosing my own dates! Sometimes dates just happen. And I am proud to say I have not spoken with Mr. Wrong in months. Romantically, he's definitely not on my radar. And as far as Mr. July goes... I apologized to him for the night before and told him I wasn't interested still. I think he finally got it. Date #8 here we come!

On the 5th date of Christmas...

12/14/2011 Mr. May 25/W/M ??? Blogger/Business Owner??

Where to begin with this one? To be honest... I really wasn't looking forward to this date to begin with. This was a friend of a friend who I had met before. Never really had any one on one conversations with this guy, but he always was pleasant, I just knew he wasn't my type. Very skinny, very metro... too much of a pretty boy for my liking. A lot of girls are into that... just not this one.

Mr. May actually called me out of the blue (maybe got my phone number from our mutual friend) and I answered and he acted really excited about the potential of being one of my 12 dates. I am not gonna lie, I really enjoyed his enthusiasm... and he acted like he was going to come up with something super fun. So I thought to mysefl, even though I don't think there will be a romantic connection, this guy has always been really nice, and seems like fun, so at least we might just have a blast. What's there to lose?

Well we kept trying to figure out a day that both him and I were available, and he told me that possibly this night was an option and that we'd play it by ear. I had a work white elelphant that evening, and this was actually the same day that I had my lunch date with Mr. April. Mr. May didn't want a lunch date, so I told him I was available this night if he wanted.

When I was done with my work party, I messaged him to see if he wanted to do this night, he seemed reluctant but then agreed. I then realized I had friday night available too if he'd rather but he was already on his way. Let's meet at 11th and East Burnside he said.

I parked and waited until he got there, and we went into the Noble Rot. This was actually my 2nd time here, the first time being with my whole family the day before my sister went in for surgery. Has a really awesome view of the city, and I really enjoyed it there last time. Well, both of us had already eaten and were aware of that, so I found it odd that we were going to Noble Rot for our date, especially since he had talked such a big game before about how exciting he was going to make our date. But whatever, no biggy. We were here, let's enjoy it.

We ordered fries and sipped on water. We people watched. The people watching was a little cliche' as he had me guess how many dates people had been on before this one and what their story was. Normally, this might be fun, but it felt really forced. I was still trying to be a good sport though and went along with it. I was trying to have fun, and was talking about how it was obvious that the girl at the table next to us, was ready to jump that guys bones and go home with him now. Mr. May replied with, "Wow. You do need a boyfriend!" Rude. This definitely rubbed me the wrong way, but I smiled and sipped my water as he continued to put me down. This is not what I signed up for.

He went on about how he was going to write a blog about our experience too, and that he was going to be tweeting updates as we were on our date. I couldn't tell if he was being arrogant and mocking me, or if he was actually homosexual with his body gestures, but I'm pretty sure he was mocking me. He couldn't get over the fact that I was blogging about our date. It was super annoying.

Then he started playing 21 questions with me. Asking me what I was really trying to get out of this whole experience, waiting for me to say a wrong answer so he could have a better blog than me. He even told me that is was going to be a competition. How awkward. I'm still trying to be polite at this point, but all I'm doing is wishing I was curled up in a ball in my bed, with some chocolate ice cream.

He definitely crossed the line when he asked if he could help me find another date for my blog, while we were on the date. Get over it already would ya? Yes, I am writing a blog. The reason I told you I was writing a blog, is so that I would be a nice person about it, but now I'm questioning this whole thing together. He made me feel so awful about myself, and about my idea. I really just wanted to have fun with this whole thing and meet some people that I might not otherwise, and in the least come out with some friends. But right now I just want to cry and quit it all.

He continued to talk all night about himself and about some weird sleeping pattern he was trying. He kept trying to promote his business to me, which I honestly let go in one ear and out the other as I smiled and nodded, hoping he wouldn't catch me not paying attention, but he was so into what he was saying that there's no way he would have noticed.

He acted like he was such the gentlemen for paying for the french fries. Big woopty doo bud. You ate most of them anyway. Gag me.

It was finally time to go, and after a torturous 2 hours or so he hugged me goodbye. Said something or other like, "Thanks, I hope you had fun." And I said something like, "thanks." and that was it. I didn't want to tell him I had fun, cause I definitely didn't. But I also didn't want to put him down, like he did me for the last 2 hours. Then he replied with, "I'm glad you had a good time." And then it almost felt like he was leaning in to kiss me. He had to have known how awful this date went, didn't he?

I got in my car, and cried. He made me feel really awful. What was I doing? I don't know if I want to do this anymore. People can be really cruel.

On the 4th Date of Christmas...

12/14/2011 Mr. April 29/W/M Lawyer

So after my wild 3rd date of Christmas... I needed some time to recover. I had been kind of slacking and not sure who my 4th date of Christmas was going to be. I recieved a facebook message a day earlier from a childhood friend of mine. I got drunk with her when I was 16 for one of the first times at her sister's house party and she played on my softball team one year with me and we would always get in trouble together. I'm actually almost certain that's the main reason why they split us up after that. I haven't seen this girl for years, but we found each other on Facebook. Gotta love social networking for that! :)

Anyway, she decided to reccomend Mr. April to me. Said he was her friend and that he didn't know that she was contacting me and that I should just trust her and ask him out. Why not? So I did. I messaged him on Facebook and he was totally down for the cause. Not wanting a super wild date, we scheduled a lunch time date.

He too came and picked me up. First impression was that he was a decent looking guy. Had a nice smile, and seemed to have a very warm personality. He asked if lunch was good, and I said sure! So we got on the road.

Well the road to lunch was probably the worst part of the date. He didn't seem to know where he was going, so we missed turns, circled around a lot, and had to pull in and reverse directions a lot. I am the worst with motion sickness... and I was super nauceaous before we even got to lunch.

Getting to talk to him though, I found out that he had just had hip surgery a few weeks ago. He was a brave sole just for walking around let alone taking me out. I started to tell him about my recent shoulder surgery, and it turns out he too had that done. Dang gina! You've had a lot of surgeries... poor guy, is all I could think.

But I couldn't help but feel super proud of him for just finishing law school and passing the bar! That is a huge accomplishment. Something I would never want to put myself through, but it sounds like he really enjoyed learning about it. What I liked about him, was that he didn't have that arrogantness about him that is often sterotyped with people and law school, or even Dr.'s have it. He was super down to earth, and didn't want to rub in his intelligence. He preferred keeping his law studies to his business side, and being a normal guy the rest of the time. Cool guy.

We ended up going to a portland trendy place for lunch. I had never been. The place was packed, so we sat at the bar. I really liked our waitress. She was super chill and both her and I had gone to Costa Rica, but different parts and were sharing our adventures. And Mr. April was actually set to take off for 2 weeks coming up! We were trying to give him some pointers on where to go and what to see! I just couldn't help but be excited for him.

Turns out the lunch place we went to serves mostly breakfast stuff so we ordered french toast, and some potatos with eggs over easy over the top of them and we shared. The french toast was heavenly! It was like a fluffy dessert. Yum! I let him have most of it, though because he seemed to really enjoy it, and I like my potato carbs!

During our date he got up to "use the restroom"... It had been a while and I honestly wasn't sure if he was coming back! I kind of chuckled to myself and thought how funny that might be if he did ditch out. But he eventually found his way back with an excuse of a line and it being far away, but I'm going to guess he had some business to take care of in there, and I'm not talking lawyer business. ;)

It was kind of a short but sweet date. We finished up lunch, I offered to help on the tab, and he hesitantly offered to pick it up. And I questioned his sincerity, and said I don't mind helping. But then he gave in, and you could tell he genuinely wanted to get it, but was maybe skeptical about the whole blogging thing.

After lunch, we kind of drove around some more, in circles a little bit. He was trying to kill time and maybe think of something else we could do. He actually wanted to try bowling, but I thought that was crazy of him considering he had just had hip surgery! So he decided to take me back, and you could see the defeat in his eyes. I reassured him though, that we didn't need to have an extravagent date for it to be a good one, and that I really enjoyed his company.

We got back towards my place and he kept going after he passed my house... he acted confident in where he was going, but I should have known better... "Where are we going, Mr. April?"... and then we had to turn around. Again. ha ha.

I felt inclined to say "Let's hang out again." He seemed like he would be a really good friend.

On the 2nd Date of Christmas...

12/5/2011

Mr. February 29/W/M Realtor

Yes, I met this guy from an online dating site. He seemed pretty cute from his pictures, and actually sent me a message longer and more intelligent then... "Looking to meet new and interesting ladies." OKAY... that's a little generic don't you think? OR ":0)" Really? You want me to respond to just a smiley face?OR " I'm impressed with our match percentage but not trying to be partof your blog... when you actually want to meet a true match let me know."... DELETE! Learn how to live a little! Is that supposed to impress me?

Mr. February seemed pretty cool, and was definitely interested in a date. Looked pretty handsome from his profile picture and the other pics he had you couldn't really tell. But definitely wasn't an ugly guy. Didn't look like a meat head either. Guys with your shirt off flexing in the bathroom mirror is not a hot look FYI.

Mr. February actually wanted to know if I was planning on taking notes on the date, or if I just wanted to let it happen as it did... which of course it was the second option. So, he seemed excited. We exchanged phone numbers and I wanted to go on the date as soon as possible. It seemed as though he wanted to drag it out for as long as possible though before we went out, which was kind of annoying to me. I wanted this to be a genuine blind date, not a "get to know you and then date"... what part of that didn't he get? Quit texting me so much, and just take me out already! I mean, I'm not going to know whether we have a connection via text... it's got to be an in person chemistry first, and then we can can get to know each other and see if we connect on a deeper personal level.

So he finally tells me he that he just has to be honest with me. Oh boy, that could mean a number of things; Is he a murderer? Was he on a sumo wrestling team? Does he chew his toenails?... What is it?!!!

He apparently had been in a car accident and had his car totaled and he didn't have a car. So it's not that he didn't want to take me out, it was that he was going to have to borrow a friend's car and wasn't sure when he was going to be able to do that. Car accidents happen. That really sucks. I can sympathise with him, because that's also happened to me and I was with out a vehicle for 6 months. I asked him where he lived and he lived out in deep Gresham by Mt. Hood Community College. Really? Ugh...that's so far, but I'm not going to be a dick. I'm obviously going to offer to come out that way and get him if he would prefer? He jumped right on it, and asked me to come out withhim that night!

Well mind you, it's already close to 7pm... I had done a really fun photo shoot that day with some friends and had been all dressed up and was finally in mysweat pants and did not feel like changing for anybody. But I wasn't just in any sweats. I was in my Blazer sweats, T-shirt, and over-sized shiny jacket! Alllriiiiight! I told him the deal... I would head out that way if he was fine I was in my sweats. He was actually sweet and said, I'm sure you'll still be cute in them. Done deal. Sweats it is. :)

Not having any clue what we were doing, I get his address and head in that direction... as my GPS tells me I'm getting closer I start to wonder if it's taking me to my ex boyfriend's apartment complex... awkward! It finally takes me further than that and I call him when I get there.

He answers the phone and tells me he is going to meet me down there and that he sees me so I am just waiting patiently in my car... all of a sudden out of nowhere my passenger door opens and this dude is sitting in my passenger seat! WTF man?! You don't just hop in someone's car if you don't know them. I was already creeped out enough by the online thing... and now it's really dark and this stranger is in my car... I introduce myself to him, but he seems less concerned about introductionsand buckles up, and then tries to give me an awkward in your seatbelt greeting hug. Let'sjust get this over with, is all I am thinking at this point.

So he starts directing me on where to go. It's as if he's trying to be romantic and surprise me, which is a really hard thing to do when a) you don't know someone. and b) They are driving.

It was as if we had been dating for months and he was trying to do a grand romantic gesture... but it just wasn't going over too well. Kudos for trying though.

So finally when we get close to where we are going I have a pretty good idea that we are headed to the Grotto to see the Christmas lights! This actually kind of excited me. Not necessarily that it was the greatest date idea ever, but the fact that I had never been and I had lived so close to it for a long time. I love Christmas stuff! We get there and I offer to pay my way, but he gets it. Very nice of him. He also brought me gloves and a hat if I wanted since it was outdoors! Sweet! I'll take the gloves!

We get there and we're outside walking, looking at the lights. It's kind of silent, because this feels a little on the romantic side, and I don't even know this guy. Then, all of a sudden he just starts chatting away, and his alterior motive for the date starts to become apparant. I think he was just really excited to get an honest opinion from a girl.

Mr. February proceeds to ask me out of nowhere, "If a girl tells you she thinks you're attractive, but not attractive enough to date, what does that mean?" Are you really asking me this right now??? I reply with, "She obviously wasn't attracted to you then." Then thoughts start rolling through my head about how attractive this guy is. I thought he was a decent looking guy, but definitely not as cute as he was in his picture. Then I just find myself analyzing his looks, which I definitely wasn't doing before. He seemed upset that a girl wouldn't just be honest with him and tell him that they weren't attracted to him straight up. I tried to explain him that's what they actually did, he just didn't get it. Is this date over yet?

So we go inside the Grotto and there was a high school choir singing. We sat down to listen, and I was actually really impressed. Forgot where I was for a moment, because I was listening to this beautiful christmas music and my mind kept wandering to the fun adventure I had earlier in the day at a photo shoot with my friends, and there just so happened to be a guy in the Grotto wearing his Blazers gear as well. It was like Blazers night there! I fit right in! I was grinning from ear to ear thinking back on my day... and then oh yeah! I'm here with this odd guy. The music finished, and we are on our way out.

It was a pretty short date, but I already knew I wasn't interested in more, and I had to drive him all the way back out to Gresham, and then get myself home. It's a monday night! He proceeds to tell me he wanted to take me downtown too but it's probably getting late. I quickly agree and we head back to drop him off.

In the car ride home was when it got really bad. He proceeded to ask me more dating questions. The least I could do with this guy is be honest with him and give him some honest feedback, which was becoming very apparant that he needed it desperately. He asked if I really wanted to be dating. I said, yes, I wouldn't be doing this otherwise. He then went into numerous stories of women who told him they wanted to date him but after a few dates, decided they weren't looking for a boyfriend. He seemed frustrated that women didn't really know what they wanted. And I let him know, that they knew exactly what they wanted... it just wasn't you. Not trying to be harsh to this guy... just trying to straight shoot it.

We're almost back and he starts going into his baby mamma drama. I honestly didn't even remember that he had a child. Apparantly he has a 10 year old and is 28 himself, and told me he hadn't had a girlfriend for 8 years! 8 Years? Really? eeek... Well, then he tells me he's pissed off that his ex fiance/baby mamma from 8 years ago is just now telling him why she broke up with him. The reason? Because she just wasn't happy! Well duh! But Mr. February was livid at her response. He was wondering why she hadn't told him this earlier, because maybe they could have worked it out. Somebody shoot me.

Now you want to know about my ex? Another one of those... I really don't care to tell you about my ex. I had been parked for a while waiting for him to get out of my car, but he kept yapping and asking me questions. What have I gotten myself into? He finally left, and I was mentally exhausted. Mr. March better be fun, or this is going to be a looong 12 dates of Christmas...

The 12 Dates of Christmas intro:

So a lot of you have been asking about where my christmas dating blog is at??? Well, I have decided not to post my blogs until after all of my dates are complete... yes, The Bachelor Style. I will be releasing the blogs one by one after all of them are complete. The motivation behind writing these blogs is not to hurt anyone's feelings, and I'm genuinely sorry if that happens, which I know it probably will. I just want to be as honest as I can, and tell my dating stories as if I were telling a girlfriend. So if you can't handle that, please do NOT read! If you are under 18... also please do NOT read! lol. If you are my mother or father... read at your own risk! If I work with you, please do not read either, or at least don't judge!

For those of you who don't know what this is all about: I posted a couple minute video on the internet looking for dates. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f1zFHca-ptM Asking that the guys write to me and tell me what they want to do on the dates. I am informing them that I am blogging about our experience. Maybe not the best way to get dates, because people will either want to be phony, or they don't want to be blogged about and might pass up the opportunity. To them, I say grow a pair! (In the nicest way of course :))... I am not using any names or faces in these blogs... so I don't think it will hurt! Plus, will it not be refreshing to get an honest opinion on a date that you wouldn't otherwise receive?

In all honesty, it's tough being a 26/female that is out in the dating world... especially one like myself who is constantly busy busy busy. By tough, I don't mean finding dates. I actually go on plenty... but most of them bomb. It's hard to meet someone you're compatible with, but mostly that you have chemistry with, and even harder to find both! Guys my age (no offense) tend to be a little behind on the maturity level, and older guys that I might want to date, are generally already married, darn it! I know that I am still young and have plenty of time to find my soul mate... yady yada. BUT, I still want to have fun and date until I do!

The holiday's especially are a tough time to be alone, I'm not gonna lie. I don't think anyone likes it, so I decided to get creative and get me some dates! Do I want to go out with someone that I might potentially like?... absolutely! I don't want to go out with just the first guy to respond... I want to at least think I might be interested in the potential bachelor.

Again, these dates are solely from my opinion on how it went. And in the end, I would like to share my opinion on what makes a good first date from my experiences, at least in my eyes. And hopefully come out of it with a 2nd or 3rd date that I wouldn't have met otherwise! :)

There will be an update on if I am dating anyone by the end of it! :)

Subscribe at your own risk! And please enjoy...

On the 1st Date of Christmas...

Friday: 12/2/2011

Mr. January: 33/W/M Software engineer?

The sun is peaking through my bedroom window, and I am excited to wake up 40 minutes early. I go for a light jog and walk with my sister all bundled up, but despite the freezing temperatures it feels amazing with the sun shining on my face. Vitamin D? Yes please!

It's a good day to be alive. I get payed, and I get treated to lunch by some friends. I never have been a Sushi fan, but I decide that today is going to be adventurous and this is what my friends have chosen... so Sushi it is. I eat everything that I tried, and I am pretty proud of myself at this point. Hi-five!

As I am getting dropped off, my friend in the back seat's stomach starts a rumblin... eek. And then I start brewin for a stewin! After some solid paper work, I'm feeling a little better and getting excited for my first date of Christmas. Not really sure what to expect.

I go back online and check out Mr. January's profile to remember what he looks like. Well, a few hours later I'm not feeling so well, so I hop in the shower. Is my stomach upset because I'm nervous? Highly unlikely! Must have been the Sushi... oh boy, another rumble. Not good.

I'm definitely not going to boge out on tonight, because I have got people waiting to hear this blog! Plus, I don't want to miss out on an awesome date, so I suck it up and do my hair and makeup. Maybe spray a little self tanner on my face to make up for my green gills.

Now, I don't know what your ritual is when getting ready for a date, and especially a first date when you're still trying to impress, but I always will put on a pair of sexy undies. Definitely not expecting or hoping to get any action, but there's something about lace underneath your pants, that will give you a little extra kick in your step. So if you catch me wearing granny panties on a date, chances are I'm just not that into him. Either that, or it's that time of the month. 50/50 chance. :) Is this just me???

Mr. January wants me to meet him downtown tonight at Paddy's (an Irish bar), and after taking the bus for the first time since I was a child last night for the brew fest (clarification: I take the max often, just not the actual bus) I decide it worked out pretty good, so I'm gonna try it again! Knowing it's now $2.10 each way, I go into the hotcake house and ask for some change for a $5.

While I'm on the bus ride over, Mr. January sends me a text and tells me not to talk to strangers tonight. If I had followed that rule, it would have made for an awkward silent date, so I gabbed away with the person sitting next to me on the bus! When in Rome! :)

I got off at the Pioneer square stop and the beautifuly lit up Christmas tree was right there! It almost feels as if I'm in another city, and exploring somewhere for the first time. Just Gorgeous. I'm almost to Paddy's and I'm at a crosswalk that is saying do not walk. I think hard about crossing anyway since no one is around, but then I think about a friend of mine who never does that, and how admirable I was about that. And then I start thinking,"what if this guy is watching out the window and see's me crossing when I shouldn't be and then writes me off..." so I wait patiently. But as soon as some creeper comes out of the ally and starts whistling at me, I book it across the street. Sometime's it's not worth the wait. And hopefully I haven't just traded one creeper for the next.

I get into the bar and Mr. January's off to the right at a booth in the corner. He actually got the last booth, and the place is packed because the Duck's game is on. Woops! Neither of us realized that. He see's me right away and waves me over to the booth. He stands up, but he's still in the booth. Is it appropriate to hug? Or shake hands? We both kind of dance around it standing awkardly, until I finally sit down on the other side and he follows suit. We shake hands across the table. The first few minutes, we're talking over each other, both making sure there is no awkward silence, but then nothing is really coming out. Calm down... relax. I think I'll order a drink. Lemon drop it is.

My first impression is that he's not bad looking, but not someone I would see myself normally being attracted to. I hate to say this, but he had bad teeth. I am really big into oral hygene, and that unfortunately is a turn off for me. They weren't the worst ever, but I defintiely noticed them, and then I started to realize why he wasn't full teeth smiling in all of his online pictures. I say, if you have bad teeth and are OK with that, then rock em and smile big, because when you don't, then it shows you're not confident... and if they bother you, do something about it. I'm getting the impression that he is a little metro-sexual because he's wearing a trendy conductor hat, and he's also commented on how much he loves my boots! Which I too love... thanks mom!

A lot of talk at the beginning of the date was about how we are both Leo's and if we stroke each other's ego's the date can't go wrong. It was cute, but he almost used it too much. I wasn't feeling much of a romantic connection with him, but I was really enjoying hanging out with him, minus my upset stomach and my sore throat that I had accumulated.

For dinner, we joked about how funny it would be to order spaghetti on a first date. Would probably get really messy. So, I definitely want to see that action take place on one of my following dates. We both opted for the French dip, which honestly wasn't much cleaner... but at least we were in it together!

For work I think he did some type of software engineer?? I am probably way off though, since my memory is horrible and it didn't really stick out. He sounded like he was really happy in his job though, which was great. He did bring up his fresh ex girlfriend a lot though. I definitely felt some bitterness still there. I felt that I should share some of my past boyfriend stuff too only because he did, but honestly, that was the last thing I wanted to talk about on the date. It made me feel like I was watching "The break-up" With Jennifer Anniston, where you're just cringing listening to it.

Another red flag, was that he talked about all of the things he wished he were doing, but wasn't doing. He wanted to be painting again, and wanted to be running again, but it felt as though he was fishing for someone to get that out of him, rather than being motivated to do it on his own.

Mr. January also pointed out on this date that I would be a really hard girl to date, since I'm all over the place... but of course he could handle it. Yeah yeah! Heard that one before buuud!

Let's have one more drink and then get out of here... debby downer's at the table..

So to lighten the mood, he drove me to Chopsticks, which is a bit of a dive karaoke bar. He knew that I liked to sing, but my throat wasn't feeling so hot... I think he more wanted to show off his Karaoke skills though. He used to work the door at Chopsticks, so it was a comfortable environment for him. He was very much a gentleman, and opened all of my doors for me. Had a super nice car too! It was a Cadillac CDC? I'm probably way off on that too. I don't care to pay too much attention to that kind of stuff... but I was almost getting a gay-dar when he was talking about it.

Maybe the Gay-dar was because he was raised by mostly his mom and had only sisters, but I'm pretty sure it was the fact that he started most of his comments with "giirrrrl" and he loved my boots, and he confessed that he had almost gone tanning before our date. Really? I think that one sealed the deal for me on the "undatable."...

He was a super nice guy overall, but as the date was almost over and he was driving me home, drug use started to come up. I'm not super judgemental on that front, especially on the lighter drugs... to each their own I say. But I am not one that wants to date someone who does that stuff, and maybe I made him too comfortable because he started talking about wanting to smoke some marijuana right then. Turn off!

I was appreciative that he offered to take me home when I wasn't feeling very good... and he was nice. Just not for me. I would definitely be his friend though. I got home and put on my sweats, and totally forgot that I was wearing my sexy panties until I did that. Not a good sign romantically, but I still had a good time over all. Looking forward to Mr. February! This is fun!